Gray rock method, whats wrong
Are you using the Gray Rock Method, but still feeling dissatisfied and wanting to scream? In this short article, we’ll discuss why Gray Rock Method not working when it comes to true boundary protection and what to do.
Note! Always remember that only specialists can make diagnoses. There is no need to accuse or insult anyone. The article will only describe my personal observations, and I am not encouraging anyone to do anything. I am not responsible for your actions.
The "gray rock" method does not protect personal boundaries; it is a tactic of retreat, not boundary defense.
I think many people confuse this with boundary protection. In fact, I used to make that mistake.
This is why every time i use this method, i will experience dissatisfaction, anger, and indignation.
The question arises: "When or in what situations should the gray rock method be used?"
In my opinion, the gray rock method should only be used when a person is codependent on a toxic person, or when the toxic person holds a monopolistic position.
Updated! Using the gray rock technique alone with an aggressor requires caution, as it can cause an unpredictable reaction and increase aggression. Preferably only in society.
In all other cases, i can safely use other direct methods of boundary protection, but not the gray rock method. And i won't feel angry and dissatisfied. And this must be done very correctly and firmly. In other words, without insulting or accusing the person.
The "I-message" method is better suited for this, instead of "You-messages." For example, "I am not going to discuss this," or "This is my decision," and so on.
What should you do if a person uses their monopolistic position for humiliation and psychological abuse? In such cases, i use only the "gray rock" method and try never to associate with such a person again.
Of course, if a person feels too free and humiliates others, there are laws for that. But a manipulator always walks on the edge of the law and is difficult to accuse.
That's all I wanted to say. Be careful, protect your boundaries correctly, and try not to make enemies.
